This is really it. The grand finale! Hoooow am I supposed to
fully convey how I am feeling through stupid little letters and
symbols. It’s a crazy mesh of gratitude, relief, heartache,
confusion, and awe.
I actually did it. There’s actually an end. I just….yeah….I’m still processing it all.
It just seems so right to be winding down. I got to be in Berlin this
week with all the trainees and I felt like this old grandma,
looking at her grandchildren and just knowing this next generation is
going to take good care of everything. They were just so excited and
fresh. I loved being around them! I just know that I gave what I
needed to and became who I needed to be and now it is their turn. I
just feel very at peace with how everything’s turned out.
I’m going to take you all down a cheesy memory lane real quick cause
each city deserves a shout out.
MTC: Sept 2014-Oct 2014
I love this place. Is it weird that it was one of my favorite parts?
Here, I learned to let go of my perfectionism and speak like a 3 year
Hildesheim: October 2014-February 2015
Here, I learned to be a missionary. It was the perfect place to try
and fail. The ward just picked me back up and loved me even though all
I could do was smile at them and let the little girls braid my hair.
Missionary work was all about love here, because that was all I could
really do. lol.
Lübeck: February 2015-September 2015
– ahhhh the refiners fire. Lübeck taught me the
power of hope even when there’s nothing to hope for. I caught a small
glimpse of the power of God, because there were days in that lovely
little city where I had absolutely nothing but Him. I learned to let
go of the need for outward/worldly praise and turn to my Heavenly
Father, the only satisfying source. I learned what sorrow was in order
to feel real joy. Honestly, I feel like I learned what it means to be
a good person from this city. It whipped me into shape.
Hannover: September 2015-December 2015
Charity. That was a hard lesson to learn. Selfless, unrecognized love.
Marzahn: December 2015-January 2016
My pride was squished and I was very humbled haha. I became very
aware of how little missionary work is about me and how much it really
is about the needs of others. I began to understand how to look
outside myself and just serve with my whole heart.
Bremen: January 2016-March 2016
God’s will is everything. God’s plan is perfect. He probably just
laughs as we complain and grumble, all the while knowing what will
happen next. I still need a lot of work on this one, because I am very
good at thinking I am right.
I read this somewhere before starting my mission: “By the time I ended my mission I learned over and over that my supposed sacrifice of a couple of ski seasons was nothing. I had sacrificed little, yet received so much.” Can I get an amen?
I just don’t even know what else to say to fully express my gratitude
for everything I’ve been through. It all sounds so superficial. I just
hope when you see me, that it will make sense.
All I can say is that, “The price paid to become acquainted with God
was a privilege to pay.”
It has been a privilege. And it will continue to be a privilege as I
end this phase of my life and begin the next one.
I love my Heavenly Father. I love Jesus Christ. I know they love me.
Mehr muss ich nicht sagen.
Im Namen Jesu Christi, Amen. 🇩🇪